I checked my mail as I was on my way to Forever 21 last week and saw I had a package from my grandma. I couldn't wait to open it so, sitting in my car, I tore into the package. She'd sent me all of my favorite easy-to-make foods, my favorite holiday candies, and the stocking that Santa had left for me every year for as long as I can remember. As I lifted that stocking out of the box, I lost it. I started bawling. I sat in my car crying to myself for probably a good 10-15 minutes. I was filled with so much love for my grandma. But I also felt terribly guilty. This is the first Christmas I've ever spent away from my family and as hard as it was for me, I can't even imagine how my parents felt. I stayed in Salt Lake for winter break to save my parents some money and the trouble of driving to Kansas City and back multiple times, but I also stayed for myself. I didn't want to be bored and trapped in Trenton. My selfishness came back to bite me though, since I've been bored and trapped in my room for the majority of break.
...but I've managed to be pretty emotionless at the same time.
My Ogden friends (excluding Chelsi and Michael) have been really unfriendly lately. One friend thinks I'm out to get all of her ex-boyfriends, so she and multiple other friends have turned against me. That's cool. Then all of the other people we normally hang out with here seem to have forgotten that I exist. Also cool. At first all of this was upsetting. But I've gotten to a point where I couldn't give two shits about their drama. You guys want to be angry at me for nothing? Cool, go right ahead. You don't want to be friends over this shit you're stirring? Your loss. I'm an awesome friend to those who an effort in.
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