I've been putting off blogging because I don't do anything worthwhile. Ever. Seriously. My life is so boring, but here's a ridiculously brief update on what I've been doing lately.
06/30: Field trip to the Clark Planetarium! We watched Born to Be Wild 3D at the IMAX and then had lunch by the fountains. The kids were told to be careful not to get soaked but of course that meant they should stand directly over the fountains, right?
06/30-07/04: Stayed in Ogden with Chelsi and Michael. The first night, we played Monster Cards again. Shown here are "The sweet scent of your mom's rotting placenta and gasoline on your dad's morning wood;" "Zombie octopi with gonorrhea tentacles giving Mitch the ol' reacharound;" and "Jesus Christ laughing hysterically at a homeless bum doing heroin in his anus."
Quotes from Independence weekend!
Chelsi: Imagine Merv with dicks as eyes.
Someone: Oh I totally can.
Chelsi: They're erect, totally erect!
Chelsi: Any time Merv is involved its hysterical
Michael(?): Plus he has dick eyes!
Chelsi: Beerwithamustache.com
Me: That beer would sell.
Chelsi: Just imagine all the hipsters buying it!
Chelsi: I love when R2 does that. It's like he shits his pants, ejaculates, and then pukes on himself. And then he sneezes and cries at the same time.
Mitch (about Hagrid's parents): How does that work, a wizard and a giant?
Chelsi: ....magic.
Chelsi: You had girls rubbing your crotch and making out with your ears?
Chelsi: I'll tell you, if I was an elder I would masturbate all the time and never tell my bishop.
(If you can't already tell, I think Chelsi is HILARIOUS! Everything she says cracks me up)
07/05: Paul and I had a small, lame party in our apartment. Stuart claimed to be drunk off of one beer and one shot, got the drunkchies, and then passed out.. only to be dry humped and cuddled by Mitch. Awkward.
07/05-07/11: This little girl Lah Le Paw and her sister Htoo Htoo have been making me a ton of rings, necklaces, bracelets and crowns out of flowers during recess. It's so freaking cute.
07/09: It's very likely that Mitch acquired mono... so on Saturday, I (being the lovely little saint that I am!) drove all the way to Ogden to spend a relaxing day with him. We finished Star Wars episode I, watched part of HP2, and then saw Cars 2 with his family. At the theatre they had a Wonka vending machine! It was $3 for two tiny scoops of candy but still! A Wonka vending machine! How cool is that!
07/11: Paul and I went to multiple 7-11's after I got home from work but EVERY SINGLE ONE WE WENT TO WAS OUT OF FREE SLURPEE CUPS. It was so sad. I've never had a Slurpee before and I was really looking forward to this day. :( But our day improved just a bit when we got home and our black neighbors were willing to communicate with us through the walls again.
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